Buzz To The Rescue

Buzz Lightyear? No. Buzz to the Rescue, not the book. My friend, Buzz. Right man for the right job. I wanted to hook my camper up because I have an appointment in the morning for new tires and to have my bearings packed with grease. One of the pins used to hold the sway bar in place was missing. I made my third trip into town today (ouch) to find a pin. I bought one and brought it home. Samuel said it would not work. I ask him to try. Of course, it did not work. It was already 7:30 pm and it was getting dark. I called Buzz and told him the problem I was having. He said to come on over and he would see what he could do. A machinist by trade, Buzz can make anything from metal. We went to his shop and after a couple of trys he made me another pin. I wish I would have had my camera. It was pretty cool to watch.

When I got home Samuel was curious as to how we would hook up the camper. I showed him both pins. He looked at them and said, "He made that?".

Thank you Buzz for helping me out. Thank you Joan for loaning me your husband! I appreciate it.

How To Eat A Moon Pie In One Bite

My son-in-law, Mike, entertains us with his, "Eating a Moon Pie in one bite". The things you'll do while on a road trip!

Road Trip Humor

June 15, 2008 Trip to Tybee Island, Georgia

Mike, Anna and Abigail were sitting in the backseat. They got tired of all the stuff in the backseat and threw it up front with Samuel. Nothing like a little humor on a long roadtrip.

The Tennessee Wildflowers and The Kudzu Band

Tonight Abigail and I went to see The Tennessee Wildflowers and The Kudzu Band. The Wildflowers are Dianna Ford, and sisters, Cathy Walls and Jeannie Gentry. The Kudzu Band was Royal Morehead, Craig Yarbrough and Jeannie Gentry. They played at the Square Beans Coffee Shop on the square in Collierville. It was our first time to see them play as a group.

For me the drive to Collierville was full of memories. Brent and I and the kids used to drive to Collierville on Friday nights for the weekly bluegrass pickin'. We would stay on the square on Friday nights until very late. I'd bring a cooler with drinks and snacks for the kids. I always brought pillows, blankets and a chase lounge in case Abigail needed a nap. The kids would always ask, "When are we going home?" My answer was always the same, "When Daddy gets finished pickin'. " Brent at one time or another had picked, sang or was in a band with with all those who were in the band tonight.

We arrived at the coffee shop before the group started playing. We greeted the group and other MABA friends. Abigail and I decided to treat ourselves. She ordered a Strawberry Lemonade Smoothie which was very good. We shared a Chocolate Truffle! Yummy! I ordered coffee which was very smooth.

How would I describe the music of The Tennessee Wildflowers? It's a mix of gospel, rock 'n roll Elvis, bluegrass, country, old timey and Appalachian music with a bluesy jazz sound. I enjoyed their choice of songs, many of which are not performed by local bands. Dianna does a great job of singing harmony with Jeannie and Cathy. Cathy has a powerful voice. Someone heard Cathy singing at the Williston Festival and ask me if that girl singing was from Nashville.

My friend, Betty Westmoreland, is so good about listening to a band, while writing down their song set and reviewing the bands she listens to. Betty I cheated and asked Dianna for their song set. I feel sure they sang most of the songs on the list, but with a few changes.

Here is a list of the songs: Set 1 - Love Me Darlin' Just Tonight, All I Ever Loved Was You, Blues Stay Away From Me, Can't Even Get The Blues, Coal Mining Man, Meet By The Moonlight, I'm blue/I'm Lonesome, Sea Of Regret, Six Hours On The Cross, One More River To Cross, Today I Started Loving You Again, Old Chunk Of Coal, Don't Be Cruel, Tear My Stillhouse Down, The Sun Will Never Set Again. Set 2 - Can't You Hear Me Callin', Daddy Sing Bass, Working On A Building, Crazy Heart, Southern Moon, I Saw Your Face In The Moon, Little Darlin', West Virginia, Dark As The Night, Sing, Sing, Sing, Barbed Wire And Roses, If That's The Way You Feel, Standing In The Need Of Prayer, No One Will Ever Know, Heartaches And Teardrops, Jesus Keep Me Near The Cross. Optional songs - I'll Never Grow Tired Of You, Precious Lord, Take My Hand, You Don't Have To Move That Mountain, Where The Soul Of Man Never Dies, Say Won't You Be Mine.




















Left to right: Mike "Buzz" Busby, Craig Yarbrough, Royal Morehead, Jeannie Gentry, Cathy Walls, Dianna Ford, and Steve Craig. Mike, Royal Jeannie and Dianna were the original members of Brent's band Loosahatchie Grass. Steve is also a former member of Loosahatchie Grass. Randal Morton, not shown, was also an original member of Loosahatchie Grass.

I was happy to see so many of my friends at the coffee shop.

Not someone you'd expect to see, some of us caught a glimpse of actor, Steven Seagal who lives in the Memphis area, peeking in the window. Someone said he was taking a look at Royal's guitar.

Another local favorite band, "Deep Hollow" was playing at Otherlands tonight. I couldn't see both of them and had to pick. I'll see you guys down the road at another show.












I'll add more video clips to this post. They take a long time to upload, even with DSL. That's why I only take 10-25 second video clips.

Mother's Dinner, August 19, 2008

Thought I'd post of couple of photos from the Mother's Dinner for our homeschooling group. It's late so I'm going to go to bed. I'll write a little something tomorrow evening.

I put this video here so you will have an idea of how loud it can be during dinner time!

Feeling Nostalgic

My brother-in-law, Ronnie, cut my back field this past weekend. I decided to take a walk back there to just look at it. It was quite and just a field, but it sure felt good. The first photo is of the edge of the yard before you begin walking down the path to the back field. There really is a path there!

It's a lovely afternoon here in Tennessee. There's a slight breeze and the temperature is about 78 degrees. There seems to be a time in August every year when we have a cool spell. Autumn is right around the corner. The trees are letting go of some of their green, I hear the harsh stridor caw of the crows, and the song of the katydids. All this pleases my senses. I've enjoyed this time of year for as long as I can remember. Nostalgia is probably a good word to describe how I feel right now. Momma would take us to downtown Memphis to go shopping for school clothes. School would start soon and the trees would turn lovely colors.
This photo is of the old oak tree where my father built us a tree house, or I should say a tree floor. It was just a floor with no sides and no top. During the summer I would climb up there to read a Nancy Drew mystery, the latest Book Mobile or Weekly Reader book. Sometimes I would climb higher up the tree, or just lay back and daydream. On Sundays, my girlfriend, Ramona, and I would climb up there and eat Sunday dinner. It was a real get away! The old oak has some dead places in it, but I certainly remember it with fondness.


Why would I take a photo of bushes? This is the spot where my mother had her clothes line. It was a good 50 yards from the house. She washed clothes and hung them to dry in this spot everyday for years. No matter the time of year, I can remember her hanging clothes out to dry. Of course, when my sister and I were tall enough we had to start hanging clothes to dry. It wasn't much fun when the weather was cold. In those days before the wonderful fabrics they have now, we also had to iron our clothes. A chore I never seemed to mind.


Almost to the back field. It only takes a couple of minutes to walk from the house to the field. But, when you're remembering your childhood, it takes a lot longer. There is a small, very small hill just before you enter into the field. It's as if you were walking into a sunken bedroom or den in your home. Growing up, it was more dense with bushes than it is now.






Here it is. The back field, maybe 4 acres or so. For several years this whole field was full of Dewberries. Ronnie told me there were some trees in this field that were at least 3 inches around on the trunk. The rest of the property is woods. There is a creek in the back where we would swim. At Thanksgiving my cousins, John, Dan and Quinn would go hunting back there.

I'm so thankful that I've ended up at the old homestead. I feel at home. How would I have felt living in the home Brent and I had bought together? I don't know. I do know that Brent supported me in my decision to move home to care for Daddy. Brent knew this house needed a lot of work and was willing to work to make it our home. Now, it's up to me to finish what we started. I feel blessed to have my sister and brother-in-law next door.

Family Photo

Family photo taken, Friday June 20, 2008, by my daughter, Anna. We had such a wonderful time. I could have stayed on that veranda another month. It was so relaxing!

Dying and Death

The photo above was taken at my desk at hospice.

On Friday, August 01, 2008 Sally Karioth, RN, ARNP, Ph.D., was one of several speakers for a conference, Keeping Sacred Promises:Delivering Excellence in Antemortem Care sponsored by Methodist Healthcare, Memphis, Tennessee. Before speaking at the conference she graciously accepted a request to speak to our hospice group.

She has a long list of degrees, certifications, and professional memberships. You may visit the following web page: http://nursing.fsu.edu/Faculty_Staff/Profiles/Faculty/Karioth.html
She is well qualified to speak about dying and death. She travels more than 500,000 miles a year sharing what she knows about dying, death and grieving. She's a great speaker who is animated, full of warmth and tells funny stories. She cares deeply about those who are grief stricken, especially for parents who have lost a child.

After she spoke she asked if there were any questions. I wanted to know what happened in our culture that changed our perspective of death and dying from talking about it and accepting it to never talking about death and not accepting it. Her answer was penicillin.

My thoughts are that we saw doctors could cure people of their disease. People were dying less from common causes. We thought they could cure anything. Families used to be involved with their loved ones who were sick. When they died, wakes were held in the parlor. When my father was nine years old, in 1926, his maternal grandfather had died. The wake was held in my great grandparents parlor. There is a little book that I love. The title is something like Cornbread and Vinegar Pie. It is the 1890 diary of a woman, Mrs. Jackson, who lived in Arkansas. One of her entries is about how she made a face cover for a deceased neighbor. Another of my favorite books, a gift from my Cousin Sharon, is "Women's Diaries of the Westward Journey", Lillian Schlissel, @1982 Schocken Books, New York. The book covers the journeys from the East to the West from 1841 - 1867. Death on the trail was a common everyday experience. Children died from falling out of the wagons, being trampled by oxen, and a variety of disease. Mothers died of childbirth and many family members on the trail drowned while crossing rivers. Having a photograph of their deceased loved one was considered a precious treasure. They would have to bury their loved one on the trail and move on hoping to make it to Oregon or California before winter set in.

Mourning in the 1800's was a tradition that I'm glad is gone. Imagine the Civil War in this country from 1861 - 1865. A Widow would be in morning anywhere between 12-18 months. She was dressed in black, of a dead hue , not a lively blue black. The Widow's veil is made out of black crepe and was worn very long. The mourning time for parents was one year. A veil was worn, but not over the face as the Widow's veil. Mouring for a sibling, stepparents, or grandparents was a year, but the mourning period could be shorter. The Mourning Period for an aunt or uncle was 3 months. Wives and husbands wear mourning clothes for the relatives of their spouses. Mourning for children would be nine months. It was common for men and women to marry soon after the death of their spouse. Just think about the woman during the Civil War whose husband, young son or father died in battle, perhaps her father-in-law and an uncle died during war also. How long did she have to mourn? Homes were decorated with black crape, clocks stopped at the time of the person's death, photographs were covered with black crape or turned towards the wall. Visit the following web page for more info: http://mdah.state.ms.us/admin/news/manship_mourn.html

Then we move to a time when families were not told anything and not allowed to see their loved ones who were in the hospital. Death became to clean and antiseptic. Let's also remember that women had delivered babies for thousands of years without the help of doctors. When my siblings and I were born, my mother was whisked away, given "twilight" and the next thing my Daddy knew he and Momma were parents! My maternal grandmother died of colon cancer when I was 12 years old. All I knew was that my grandmother was sick and Momma would stop by her house every morning after working 3rd shift at the hospital as a nurses aid. I was shocked when she died.

In the 1970's hospice was introduced in the United States. We were encouraged to let our loved ones die at home with dignity, surrounded by friends and family and things that were familiar. Home births were also coming into fashion.

Why are we so afraid of death? It happens to all of us. We are a society who lives for the moment and ignores the future. We don't want people to know we're sick as if there were shame in it. Have you been told that you are dying? Are you keeping it a secret? Why? You are depriving yourself and your family a special time together. It's a chance to share "wouldas", "couldas", and "if only" moments can be avoided. There is a chance to make amends, to close out the business of life and enjoy the moments you have left. It is a great gift to leave for your family.

For me, the most important thing that Sally Karioth said to our group was to have "at least one exquisite moment everyday." When today is gone it is history. What history are you making today for your family to remember when you are gone?

Never Ending Projects

I will begin by saying, I am not a project kind of girl. I do not like to paint, pick wall colors, fabric swatches, screw in light bulbs and I especially do not like to hang window dressings of any kind. I'm content to keep things as they are and let things fall down around me. I'm very much like my father in this department. I sometimes wonder how he managed to build 3 houses. My sister, Grace, is another story. She is exactly like my mother when it comes to projects around the house. She is fabulous! Thank goodness she is willing to help me. We both want to restore this "old house" to its former glory. It is our homestead. On the day this photo was taken, July 30, 2008, we had shopped at Home Depot for all the things we needed for a couple of projects around the house. Before my mother died she had started turning the small bedroom into a library. I want to complete the library so that I have a place for all of my books. I would also like it to be a history/genealogy room. On the list of projects "to do list" is to finish the basement. I'll have to do a whole post on that one.

We started at one end of the store and walked to the other side picking up "stuff". I was so tired. I wanted to whine like a small child and beg to go home. I was exhausted.

Grace once said, "Together we make the perfect woman." We were sitting on the front porch taking a quick break from the care of our father. I took care of Daddy's physical needs 24 hours a day. Our family had moved in with him to take care of him. Daddy was in the bed 24/7. Grace on the other hand took care of me and my needs. She helped me out by washing dishes (before I got a dishwasher), doing laundry, buying groceries, sweeping, cleaning Daddy's room and so many other things. It was during this time we found out that my husband, Brent, had leukemia. We were both doing double duty. We did it together and I'm so thankful we get along. She and I each have a strengths and weaknesses and work together to make things go smoothly. I am blessed.

When Brent, the kids and I moved into Daddy's house, the house I grew up in, it was one project after another. It continues to be one project after another. I hope that in some way you will be encouraged as I share, "Projects Around The House" a seemingly never ending story. Together Grace and I will get this house ship shape.

Daughter Reading To Mom

Abigail reading me a bedtime story!

I Wonder About You, My Blog Reader

I wonder about the people who read my blog. I check my visitor map regularly to see where you are from. It's fun to see where you are from. Are you a returning visitor, or are you new to my blog. What's going on in your life? Do you enjoy reading my blog? Has it been helpful to you?

Why are you reading my blog? Is it because you know me personally, a friend suggested you stop by or did you find me by happenstance?

Are you a widow? If you are, please know that life will be get better each day. You are stronger than you think. Make the most of each day because it will never come again.

Helen and Liz Have Lunch

Liz invited me to lunch at the Neighborhood Bistro. Of course, our meal was prepared by her son, Paul, the chef at the restaurant. We had a nice time talking. Thank you Liz for a nice afternoon.

Friday, May 04, 2007

The following is from my daily journal that I kept while Brent was at Johns Hopkins Hospital.

It's 2:30 pm Friday afternoon. There is a Bible verse that comes to my mind. God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Psalm 46:1

The facts are that Brent has been in Baltimore, Maryland for 116 days. I've been here 114 days. Samuel and Abigail have been here 97 days. Brent has been in this hospital room for this hospitalization for 50 days. He has been in the bed unable to get out and stand on his own two feet for 35 days. It has been 42 days since his bone marrow transplant.

I'm sitting here watching Nurse Rick care for Brent. So much has happened in the last 28 hours. It will take awhile to write it all, but I will get all my thoughts down.

So many have called in the last 24 hours. I have called so many. Some of those who have called are Dianna, Royal, Sharon, Grace, Ramona, Anna, Granny (Brent's mother), Matt and Todd. There are many more I just can't remember them all.

8:25 pm, I'm in the room with Brent. I left around 5:30 pm and came back about 7:30 pm. He's resting. Jeannie and Matt called. Nurse John will be here in a little bit to give him some medicine to help him sleep.

Today at one point he wanted to get up and go home. He has said that every once in awhile during his hospital stay.

8:35 pm, Nurse John gave Brent some Adavan to help him rest. He has been moaning and groaning some. He did grimace some too. He's not in pain, just uncomfortable.

Daneen just came in. Her parents want to visit with Brent. They'll come in about 20 minutes.

8:40 pm, Nurse John came in and set up a morphine drip. Brent will get a smidgen of morphine through an IV.

8:45 pm, It's very sad that Brent must leave this world and yet I should be happy that he will be going home to Jesus. Brent will be singing praises to Jesus everyday. There has been such and out pouring of love and support from all of our friends. It would have been wonderful for Brent to die at home or at least in Tennessee.

Brent and I talked over the years about which one of us would die first. It would be hard for both of us but, Brent would always say, "I just couldn't go on without you. I wouldn't know what to do." On the other hand I could see a life after his death. Oh, I will miss him. I hope I will make him proud about the decisions I make down the road. I've always said i would NOT want to marry again. That's up to God if I do, but I'd rather stay single, finish raising Samuel and Abigail, and work on my genealogy.

9:00 pm, Brent's sister Debbie called. She wanted to call back tomorrow. I told her no, talk to him now, don't put it off, say all the things you want to say.

Daneen and Robert and Daneen's parents, Bob and Jan, came in a little after 9 pm. We all gathered around Brent's bed while Bob prayed.

Thursday, May 03, 2007

The following is from my daily journal that I kept while Brent was at Johns Hopkins Hospital.

I arrived in his room at 8:45 am. The nurse was feeding him a little breakfast. He had eaten a little bit of egg and drank some milk. I hadn't missed the doctors rounds.

Brent was always wondering when I'd make it to the hospital. I would tell him that I had to take care of myself and I insisted that I get a good nights sleep. I would wake up when I needed to. Our youngest two children and I had moved to Baltimore, MD so that I could be Brent's caregiver while he was at Johns Hopkins Hospital. We were in a strange city and for a long time didn't know anyone. I had to leave my children alone in the apartment every day. I would visit with him everyday, but had to leave time for the children too.

At 9:00 am the doctors came into the room. The doctor walked over to me and knelt down in front of me.

I instantly knew it wasn't going to be good news. Brent and I had hoped that things would turn out the way we wanted them to. He had accepted his diagnosis with the determination to do his part and leave it up to God to take him home or to leave him here with me and the children. He said he was ready either way. Brent told me early on during his illness that he hadn't ask God "why" this time. He had ask God "why" when our still birth daughter,Katie, was born. This time he didn't ask "why", because God had told him, "I Am".

"Mrs. Davis", said Dr. Huff". "Mrs. Davis, Mr. Davis' leukemia has come back, and there is nothing we can do for him. He has 2-3 days left."

There was a flood of emotions that swept over me. There were several other doctors in the room. They were all looking at me with sorrow on their faces. I wondered what my face looked like to them. Were they expecting me to faint, to fall apart, to scream, to start crying? I wanted to be brave and in command of my faculties. The hope that I had had all these months was gone. Just like that, my husband was going to die. It was a shock to hear those words. My knees went weak, even though I was sitting, my stomach started churning and tears welled up in my eyes.

I looked at the doctor and said, "Oh, my. I don't think I can tell him because I might cry. You'll have to tell him."

We went to his bedside. I was standing next to her with my hand on Brent's hand. "Mr. Davis"?, she said softly and with compassion. He looked directly into her eyes. "Your leukemia has come back and there's nothing we can do." "There's nothing you can do?", Brent said. "No, Mr. Davis, there's nothing we can do." With acceptance and knowing that God had chosen to take him Brent said, "Well, okay then." I ask him if he was afraid. His response was, "I don't know."

I called his parents first, my oldest daughter at work, and then my sister. I sat with him for awhile. Rhonda, the chaplain, came in and prayed with me and for Brent. Now, I had to go back to the apartment and tell my children Samuel, age 14 and Abigail, age 8 that their father wasn't going to live. Telling them that, was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life.